I never post twice in the same day, but I just got some information that I have to talk to someone about, but there's no one around to talk to at the moment so I'll blog about it and then I'll feel better. :)
I got information today that our adoption agency is lowering the expected wait time for boys from 18 months to 14-17 months! They said nothing about girls, but between that and the fact that I've seen 15-16 month waits for boys AND girls lately, that's really good news, right?!
I might just be getting excited about nothing, but I literally take every single piece of information I get from the agency and hold on to it for dear life. Waiting this long for an adoption to happen should be classified as cruel and unusual torture, lol. I just want to open the mailbox and find an envelope with her photo in it. I want her to finally be a real person. Our family is ready and there's a space in my heart where Clarissa ought to be.
So lets all hope that things really are speeding up, and in the meantime all I can do is wait and pray. I pray for peace for her birthmother, I pray that Clarissa is growing safe and strong, and I pray that I don't have a complete nervous breakdown before she finally gets here, lol. Even though I don't have a photo to look at or a baby to hold, Clarissa is a part of my life already. I hope that later in her life if she struggles with her adoption, she'll understand how much she was loved and wanted, even before she was born.
UPDATE: OK, it's an hour or so since I wrote the first part of this blog. I e-mailed our contact from the agency to ask her what the wait is looking like for girls and she said that it's a 1-3 months longer than for boys! She said that she was pretty sure that we'd be receiving our referral sooner than we originally though. So that means that we could potentially be receiving our referral as early as February!! That's only four months from now! And if that's the case, because babies are five months old before they're eligible for an international adoption, it means that it's possible that Clarissa has already been born. Now THAT blows my mind! I know it's only a matter of a few months, but it's suddenly just seeming so reachable now. It's starting to seem real.
I'm really happy about life today. :)