Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Busy Busy Busy!!

I know people are waiting for updates on how things are going here and I keep meaning to give long updates filled with photos and fun information, but I'm so busy with Clarissa that the day gets away from me and by the evening I'm too exhausted.

When I think of the kind of mom-with-a-baby I want to be I imagine that I'm going to be one of those moms who is always dressed with my hair done by 8am and a nicely organized to-do list. The house will be clean, we'll have the errands run by noon and we'll spend the afternoon at the park. It's all very nice in my head, lol. In reality at the moment I'm one of those moms wearing pajamas at noon with sweet potatoes on my shirt and rice cereal in my hair. My house looks like we invited hurricane Katrina over for a play date and last nights stimulating family conversation was whether we should have Arbys or Carls Jr. for dinner.

Having said that, I AM ridiculously happy with our current situation I just wish I was a little more June Cleaver and a little less Rosanne Conner at the moment, lol.

Having a baby in the house again has thrown me for a loop a little! I totally feel like a first time mom again! It's been six years since we had a baby in the house and in that time I've apparently forgotten how to to do it, lol. Clarissa is SO much fun and I'm having a ball with her, it's just taking me some time to figure out how to take a shower when you're home alone with a baby and to remember that you can't go grocery shopping when it's nap time! We'll figure it all out.

Clarissa is a really happy baby and I'm loving playing with her during the day. When she grins her whole face crinkles up and it melts my heart every single time. The boys are so in love with her, she fits in to our family absolutely perfectly.

She's still super clingy to me though, which is totally normal given what she's been through. Everything I've read about attachment says that they often pick a "safe" person and hang on for dear life at first. She's not necessarily clinging to me because she loves me yet, but at the moment I'm her safe person. The love and trust develops over time. I have to admit, I kind of like it-she's SUPER snuggly and loves to be held and cuddled. I could snuggle with her all day long. It's the reason I'm not getting anything done though!

We're still having sleeping issues with her because she only wants to sleep ON me. Not next to me, but on top of me. She's sleeping in our bed for the time being, which we planned on all along, but she can't realistically (or safely!) sleep on me all night, so we've spent a lot of time awake with her a night. I wait until she falls asleep and then try to roll her off of me and lay her next to me, but she's on to that trick. It doesn't work.

Every day she is becoming more and more comfortable with us and is more comfortable playing on the floor with toys during the day and being away from me a little bit, but when it comes to night time she's still hanging on to me like a life raft in the ocean. I feel really bad for her, she must be so confused. She likes us fine but I'm sure she's still wondering where her foster mother is and when she's coming back. The lack of sleep is really hard for me, but I have to keep reminding myself that what I'm going through is nothing compared to what she's going through. So I'll keep being patient and hopefully over time she'll relax a bit and be more comfortable sleeping on her own at night.

So between the fact that I'm not sleeping at night and I have a baby who loves to be snuggled all day, my hair isn't done, my house looks like Toy's R Us threw up and dinner often involves pepperoni and a delivery guy. It's still week one though. Maybe by next week I'll have the schedule down a little better and I'll magically become June Cleaver. I DOUBT it, but we can always hope! :)

19 comments:

Clem said...

I luv your updates!

K said...

You are too cute Wendy! Enjoy this time! Cleaning, cooking, shopping and everything else can wait. You have a daughter :)

Big House Creations said...

It sounds as if things are going perfectly. Pepperoni, pajamas and rice cereal in the hair are all signs of a good transition. :)

My5Blessings said...

I totally agree with what K said, enjoy your daughter they are only babies ONCE, everything else will get done when you can. I am totally lost with a newborn in the house for months! I am not one of those totally organized make up and hair done by 8:00, house immaculate everyday with a baby...I doubt anyone is, they just appear to have it all together!
It all takes time...for the past two years your house has been immaculate, your hair and make up done by 8:00 but your life was uncomplete and empty! Now nothing gets done but your heart is overflowing with completeness and love from your new baby girl. Take a deep breath, it's only been a week!
Enjoy the "hurricane" and so what if you are eating take out every night for dinner, I bet the boys are loving that lol It WILL get easier!!! {{{BIG HUGS}}}

Take care,
Michelle

Becky said...

I am so happy for you and the family that is now complete!

Lydia said...

it's only been one week! of thousands and thousands! you're doing wonderful, you are such a good mom!

~*Jenn*~ said...

I SO look forward to your updates, I'm so glad everything is settling in so nicely, Clarissa could not have gotten a better family!!

Amanda said...

I know it's got to be hard! Hang in there......Just like with a newborn things will get easier!!!!

JINHA said...

hi wendy!!
It's been a long time.
I just want to see your family's photo but i couldn't enter to your site. How can i enter, I did alreay resister for ID and password but I can't enter.How should I do...tell me i need your help ^^.
Jinha

Ashley said...

Screw your hair and housework, you have a baby girl!! The rest will fall into place later (unless you're like me, then you'll just learn to embrace the messy life).

I can hear the happiness in your "voice". Congrats again, I'm smiling for you!

Christine said...

I love reading your updates about your new journey. Clarissa is beautiful. I've really enjoyed reading about your trip to Korea because it takes me back to some of the things I miss so much about Korea. If you check out my blog I've passed on a blog award to you.

KSGirl316 said...

Hey maybe for her sleeping situation, you can put a pillow in between you when she falls asleep on you and then move the pillow onto the bed when you think shes in a deep enough sleep. I don't know if that will work, but maybe just a suggestion!

Lori said...

Eh, June Cleaver was over rated. Sure she looked like she had it all together, but was she really happy?

You on the other hand, sound truly happy! I say give yourself six weeks. Just like with a newborn, it takes about 6 weeks to get a routine going.

Sapphire, Dana, Karalee & Alastair said...

I just wanted to say I've followed your story on baby center for the last few months and it brings tears and smiles to me when I read your blog posts. I'm so thrilled for you and your family that Clarissa is home in the beautiful room you made for her. :-)

Janine said...

Beautiful! I've followed your blog here and on BBC for a long time and I'm so happy for your family. However, I can't feel closure until you show us a pic of Clarissa in her beautiful bedroom and with her new brothers! We need a whole family shot for sure!!

Wendy said...

I have big plans for a family photo shoot on Saturday. Stay tuned! :)

Shay said...

Your updates are awesome! I am so happy for yall.

Tracie said...

It all sounds wonderful to me!!! I already told hubby to not expect anything to be done for the first few months after our girl comes home.

KrisJ said...

Well in the big picture it sounds like things are going amazingly well! I am astonished how quickly these little ones recover from such tramatic events. They are amazing! I cant WAIT to see more pics so bring it on!!